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"I never met a dollar I didn't own"
65 year old man in Jackson Hole, WY, United States
Occupation: Vice President of the United States
Looking for: Gullible presidential hopefuls
Education: Casper Community College class of 1963
Languages: English, Cowpoke, Georgebushian
Cigarettes: MAAAARLBORO COUNTRY!!! Also Newports.
Alcohol: Coors on top of Coors Light (Tan & Tanner)
Drugs: Botox, Secret-Service Grade Viagra, Aspirin
Body Art: Big fuckin' hat niggaaa!
My Most Humbling Moment: Running out of gas in front of the CIA building. I swear I almost peed myself it was so embarrassing. All the spies were laughing at me.
If I Had a Million Dollars: 100% Ivory Escalade.
Five Items I Can't Live Without: cell phone, VISA Black, Halliburton stipend, my inhuman ability to deny all verifiable fact, pacemaker
In My Bedroom You Will Find: big pile of money, hooded detainees, Presidential Medal of Freedom, old baseball glove, strategic oil reserve (I jerk off a LOT)
Why You Should Get to Know Me: I'm a confident guy who knows what he wants and am capable of disappearing for months when things go wrong. I love to travel (I even went to Jupiter once - don't tell anybody it's a secret). But mostly I like to stay at home on my ranch and fuck my wife. She recently had a new pussy installed - fresh from a "willing" Afghan donor. The skin color was a little off but we usually fuck in the dark anyway because Lynn's worried about her big fat ass.
More About What I Am Looking For: I'd like to meet nice girls who own a few record-shattering petroleum and natural gas fields, who know how to cook and swing dance. Must be okay with torturing people.
Interests: Anything that ends in "National Wildlife Refuge."